jeng jeng jeng

ahah....
after hibernating for almost the entire holiday
and successfully annihilated my social life......
i am back (at least for now)
bear the changes in this blog please..(especially the flying butterfly)
i'm in a good mood...
currently is out of kedah and heading to johore
2days transit in KL which means 2days to spend with my other half
the kilometres are stretching more and more... so better make the best of the time (wink!)
back to the blog..
its nice being childish again once in a while
having butterfly flying around seems fun
in times where the word 'babi' is the current hype...
i'm happy happy happy
- result was good
- transformers 2 was superb
- my car is fixed
- Rina is now eating non-stop
- bank account has tripled (yg ni bahaya sket ni)
- my other half is by my side

just DON'T mention the word 'maktab' or 'ipti' or 'baharum' or 'senaman pagi'
all hell will break loose!!

desperately seeking some time..and money of course

gosh..
i really got no time to blog anymore
considering that i have to take that dreadful journey to the cc
currently blogging from my mom's office
everyday i ferry her back and forth to her office but i was too shy to use this big pc (biasala budak ayu)
there are so many hot young guys here mestila kena control kann....
well, nothing is new
Rina is still hooked up with a tube - which means she still drinks only milk
it has been 3 weeks and she has grown so restless... kesian dia woo
well, next week we are going back to the Penang hospital and hopefully she can start eating properly again (she has prepared a list of food she'd want to have once the tube is off)
but till that moment comes, i will have to fix her up with milk every 3 hours and occasionally she'll have a glass of ribena.....
now that's how life is.
that's her part
what about ours?

ps: this blog really really need some pictures now... 'the other half' said its boring

just when i thought my holiday is boringg

i can't contain myself anymore today
while i stirred a glass of milk this evening i realized how long has it been since my last cyber connection....
so here i am
doing something i dislike the most - sitting in a chair in between adolescent boys who curse and fidget around while playing something that i assume would be DOTA (pandai jee..ntah2 game porno ape jek)
yep!! apparently my steamyx has been disconnected at home
there goes my treasured priviledge of having to surf in my pajamas while munching on some murukku
all thanks to my 15-year-old brother who has just discovered the world of 'love'
due to his short-circuited ability to think accordingly, our land line bill reached a certain level which almost turned my father into a particular huge green monster
so no more phone calls to him
and no more internet to the rest of us

but even if the tale above didn't happen.. i wouldn't be able to surf much anyway
in between the previous entry and these two horrible smelly school boys sandwiching me
my holiday has been nothing but eventful....
and i actually lost some weight.. (note the word 'some' might mean slightly insignificant and probable imaginary amount)

my sister Rina underwent a reconstructive plastic surgery in Penang about three weeks ago.. (i'll blog about it in my next entry)
so the whole family was pushed out of our regular routine and have to accommodate the change.
my mom went to stay with Rina at the hospital for about a week..
my dad had to work of course so he went back to ipoh after the surgery
and as usual, i have to man the household and take care of my other two siblings and also my grandma at home
yep.. i am totally domesticated now
my weapons are the mop and broom...
kid me not but i can brush a house till it sparkle
hahaha.. and those labour has driven me to think that i am now slightly lighter
though i enjoy multiple-serving meals after every chore....

now that Rina has come home.. there are more things to be monitored
because of the surgery, her mouth is off-limit to any solid food that can damage the suture in her gums so she has to feed through a tube inserted in in her nose that goes straight into her stomach
i really really feel sorry for her because i know how bad she wants to eat and actually taste food
my mom has ordered everyone in the house to not eat anything in front of our kak Rina
and we are postponing all the desires to eat food that she loves like pizza, kfc, and even waffles..
we don't mind a bit
as long as Rina doesn't feel sad and tempted
she is going to recuperate successfully and all of us are there for her..

oops i forgot that you have a time limit here..
till i'm not sure when...
hope that my dad will finally come to his senses
or my brother will finally realize that the phone calls involve cash flows..
i'm just at home being a daughter, a grandchild, and a sister
and oh, i didn't mention that i crashed my mother's car, did i??

next time, shall we?

reality or make-believe?

alahaii pengetua...eh oops..principal tiara ui....
we understand that astro would like to squeeze in as much money that they can
so please spare us from all the drama shit you just put on in front of everyone
i mean, cmon la...
we all know what akademi fantasia is..
all that surprise drama is one of its fundamentals
kejap sorg keluar, kejap dua org keluar, aiseh..there is no justice to audience's wasted vote money la.
if there is gonna be a return of an axed contestant, hey i don't even take that as a surprise anymore.. i mean, look at mawi.
wasn't he an afmasuk some time ago?
my point is, you do not have to make up some sort of supposedly-natural-looking 'performance' where you need to ternganga and looked all shocked and messed up then walked up the stage and suddenly nak guna the authority as a principal to launch the somehow-unfair afmasuk
adoyaii..why didn't you use the authority when aril-the-great (duh) was ousted?
surely everyone know who is the lucky 'guy' that will be voted back into the show....
but play it fair and square la
once you are kicked off, please remain that way
mana ade skolah expel students then take them back
pandaiinye all the people at astro..
i understand that's the way it goes but please do not simply make a fool out of the audience with a totally unconvincing drama like that...
come to think of it, ironically, isn't she is like one of the greatest actress on our land?
well, apparently that's old news

i just think honest competition brings out the pure talent
OIAM is one
glad that tomok won - he totally deserved it

currently anxious to find out if danny gokey will make it

and btw, hafiz too

conclusion: ok i am into reality shows... but is it really 'reality'?

That rare moments in life

I was called 'tak berhati perut' by someone when i failed to cry while watching Talentime...
I mean it was not my fault that I found the story to be so 'funny' and worth laughing at..
And when others wetted their pillows (mind you) at night reading P.S. I Love You, I spent hours flipping the pages to find the parts where I can actually feel something...

But today, something inside me turned upside down.
Its a feeling that made me froze for a while and my mind just stopped spinning (literally)
The same feeling I got after I watched Leonardo DiCaprio in Blood Diamond,
The same feeling I felt as I watched Amerul Affendi screamed for his beloved coconut tree during Teater Kompilasi Vol.1
The same feeling I got after learning about the C for Content-Based Instruction (nasib baik da tukar)

And its all due to Jodi Picoult's My Sister's Keeper.........
It is a real powerful novel that really hooked on me
I am no critic so I better not write a review here

I always see myself as a cynic, a romantic, and a realist
And Ms. Picoult has came up with a story so real I almost went out of my head after reading it
I guess I have to thank Mel for telling me I should buy the novel (since I have been craving for it for ages)
Owhh I'm just gonna go and read it again..
Good nite now...

one time, not too long ago, i heard my mom telling a friend of her how she wished her daughter (that would be me) had been a little bit more into studying, then she would have had a doctor-to-be as a daughter instead of a teacher-to-be (which is who i am now)

from that moment on, i realized that i never was, never am and never will be good enough for my mother..

perhaps that's the reason why i never felt how my study now is important to her..
the only times i really feel she care are when the results are in.. high scores are all that matter. the nightmares i went through to get those results never got into front-page news
she doesn't even care to know when the exams start and end

call me exaggerating, call me immature

i saying all these now at the age of 23 based on what has happened for the past 22 years
so pardon me for blabbering like a school girl because i never had a chance to so when i was a real school girl
once i turned 13, i started learning all about independent and survival up until now

i blame the society and myself
the stigmas in our society (or perhaps the society my family is in) are just too vicious
you'll get respected if your children get to be doctors and lawyers
if they are just teachers, then you are a failure as parents
sadly my mother bites into that
and the rest is history

that's why i can't wait for the next phase of my life
when i can be with the one who really know me - what i want in life and who i want to be
because if people say nobody knows you best than your own family
that ain't the case with mine

Siapa kata belajar bahasa ni cikaii??

kali ini entri dalam bahasa Melayu..
salah silap harap diampun
bukannya 'sounds stupid if i speak in Malay' tp lebih kepada kurangnya pendedahan kpd penggunaan yang sebetul2nya
cakap pasar boleh je.......

saya betul2 kurang ngerti la (indon la skitt, kt pasar kn byk indon)
kejap iya2 benerr nk mengimplikasikan matematik dan sains dlm English
tiap2 tahun pas exam besarr berlambak-lambak analisa dan kajian dilakukan
semuanya utk mengesahkan math n science in English is not a mistake....
kesiann tgk budak2 pulun tunggang langgang tonggeng menonggeng nk tukar lidah setiap kali tukar klas
mak bapak abis puluhann ribu RM utk tuisyen nk memastikan anak2 mereka tidak ketinggalan di belakang
tuisyen menguasai hampir 80% masa lapang budak2...
kamus di kedai buku habiss licinn dibeli oleh mereka.....dan juga guru2 mereka.
fon guru2 English x putus2 berdering hingga ke malam hari dihubungi oleh guru2 lain meminta rujukan untuk menyiapkan rancangan pembelajaran mereka.

semua ni berterusan utk 6 tahun berikutnye.
adikku yg bersekolah rendah kini sudah tidak lagi kenal tambah tolak darab bahagi
semuanya subtractions, multiplying, dividing... pastu kedengaran plak perkataan saintifik yang tidak pernah saya dengari...
terasa bangga gak le tgk muka adikku itu.

tup2.....

mari memperkasakan Bahasa Melayu kawan2.....
adakah dgn menggunakan English utk belajar sains dan matematik bermaksud bahasa melayu tidak diperkasakan?
kan ade kelas BM, Geografi, Pend.Islam, Kemahiran Hidup, Kajian Tempatan, Sejarah, ape kebenda Sivik tu.., ape lagi?...semua tu kan dlm Bahasa Melayu
budak2 keluar kelas tetap berbahasa Melayu. bertepuk tampar aci lut sep2 tangan bermain tetap dgn gurindam melayu.
fyi, kami mmg lebih suka berdendang nenek o nenek rumak nenek nak roboh daripada one two buckle my shoe..... xde feel orang kata

percayalah wahai pkcik2 mkcik2 di atas sana.....
pembelajaran itu dalam apa bentuk bahasa sekalipun, smua tetap sedar apa yang dahulu apa yg tidak

anda risau dgn telatah remaja skrg yang kelihatan amat maju jaya dan berketrampilan kurang Melayunya??

usaikan kerisauan itu sbb percayalah walaupun dgn skirt pendek sunglasses besarr rokok di jari, bahasanya tetap Melayu..klu dia cakap bahasa lain punn berbunyi kemelayuan....
Hidupp Bahasa Kita!!!!!

jangan la cepat melatah....
yang menjadi taruhan ialah masa depan budak2 kita. do not simply toy around with such thing.
tolong jangan buat keputusan dgn pemikiran berdasarkan poket masing2
kalau punn keputusan menggunakan English 6 tahun lalu merupakan satu mistake,
alang2 menyeluk pekasam, pandai2la sambung sendiri.... (Hidupp lagi!!)

senang kata, x payah complicatedkan perkara yang delicate sebegini...

ape yg pasti masa depan students di tangan pkcik2 dan mkcik2 di atas sana
org2 atas di tanah lain ada yg bunuh diri bile xdapat menjalankan tanggungjawab sebaik2nya..
plg cikai pun mereka letak jawatann..
senario begitu memang confirm la x wujud di tanah kita ni.
bukan nk suruh bunuh diri
AMANAH itu perkataannya................................................